


We Hecked Up

by BeetlesMcGee



Category: Castlevania (Cartoon), 悪魔城ドラキュラ | Castlevania Series
Genre: Attempted Murder, Dark Comedy, Dramedy, Injury, Multi, Nudity, Stupid Sexy Alucard, accidentally redeemed with love and kindness: the fic, but no actual sex, extended timescale, mentions of Trevor and Sypha, really they never get very far though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-10
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:06:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23092303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeetlesMcGee/pseuds/BeetlesMcGee
Summary: In which Sumi and Taka try their best and don't succeed.Meanwhile, Alucard succeeds without even trying.A semi-serious dramedy about that feel when the subject of all your murder schemes is just too kind, sexy, and lowkey pitiful to kill, and you end up taking a lot longer than you originally planned.Kind of a fix-it, but only for fun.  Don't take it too seriously.  This also extends/alters the original timescale to a certain degree.
Relationships: Alucard | Adrian Tepes | Arikado Genya/Sumi, Alucard | Adrian Tepes | Arikado Genya/Sumi/Taka, Alucard | Adrian Tepes | Arikado Genya/Taka
Comments: 26
Kudos: 169





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 80% of my reason for doing this is that I just think it’s hilarious, the other 20% is that even from a more “detached” perspective, even when I try not to think of it as an Alucard sympathizer, trying to kill Alucard came off as a really poorly thought out idea on their part. Even using traumatized villain logic, it seemed like a huge waste to try killing him so soon when there was still so much to exploit him for… on top of the waste it was writing-wise to have these two die so soon.
> 
> On one hand, I accept that it was probably the whole point, that their trauma and mistrust is so ingrained that they had some kind of violent and relatively sudden overreaction because they literally do have that much trouble being rational...
> 
> But overall, it ended up making Alucard’s whole “lesson” he needed to learn about human cruelty feel kind of forced to me. At least a little more buildup I think would’ve better captured it, but they had a lot of different stories to go over in s3.
> 
> So this fic is basically just taking the idea that they aren’t as slick as they think they are to one of its logical conclusions. I think it's a slight stretch to call it a fix-it, since I do think there was some level of narrative value in what actually happened, but this is just for fun. It does get more serious than what I was originally going for, but it’s still like half-comedy.
> 
> Also, I actually like Trephacard, this is not in any way meant to be a knock on that ship.
> 
> Also also, if you've seen a post with a similar concept to this on tumblr, I actually am the op, bug-the-chicken-nug.

It'd been about a month since Sumi and Taka had met Alucard. A frustrating, difficult month of constantly putting up with him not telling them things or showing them things, and always shooting them down when they asked about moving the castle.

It was enough to make them want to kill the damn freak of a man, a demon spawn who displayed deeply unnatural power.

Except…

He was still alive.

And it wasn't even because he was particularly cunning or powerful or anything…

They just… couldn't bring themselves to do the damn thing.

Beyond all of Alucard's power, beyond all of his wit and weaponry, beyond all of his secrets and strange behaviors…

He was just…

So frustratingly _kind._

They _knew_ not to trust him, they _knew_ they were probably running out of time to get him out of the way… but every time it seemed like they were close to killing him, he'd do some sweet little thing, some favor, some kind phrase, some gentle touch… and all the impetus to kill him would vanish.

Sumi once again disdainfully watched the same situation play out yet again, one night.

Alucard had made them fresh blackberry pie, which _definitely_ did not smell amazing and _definitely did not_ tempt her _._ She'd already lost her nerve in trying to poison him with a vampire-specific toxin in his dinner, so it didn't make her feel any better when she saw Taka happily helping himself to that pie at the kitchen table, as if nothing was wrong and he were actually their _friend._ Alucard was well away from the kitchen for the time being, so with a bit of caution she deemed it safe to speak her mind.

“What are you _doing?”_ Sumi asked in a hushed voice, as Taka just stared guiltily, cheeks stuffed like a chipmunk’s. He swallowed hard before speaking.  
  
“I-I was gonna save you some...” Taka muttered. “Or maybe Alucard could make another?”  
  
“That’s not the problem! The problem is that you’re getting too cozy with him. You’re letting your guard down too much.” Sumi replied.  
  
“I-it’s just pie…” Taka guiltily replied.  
  
“ _Today_ it’s ‘just pie’. Tomorrow you’ll be practically kneeling at his feet, like a dog. He’s softening you up, Taka.” Sumi said quietly, her expression sharpening as she drew in close.  
  
“But… Sumi, he made blackberry pie! Fresh picked the berries himself! And it’s _sooo_ good!” Taka replied.  
  
“Hmph. Keep this up and you’ll be soft in more ways than one. Soft and the size of a house,” Sumi replied.  
  
“Wh-what’s that supposed to mean?”  
  
“Nothing, besides the fact that I think a _certain someone_ might be getting a little chubby,” Sumi snidely replied… Really, she was being dramatic and she knew it. For the most part, he’d only lost some ab definition, which was a pretty natural response to having one place to stay and a consistent food supply.  
  
“Really?” Taka replied, blinking down at himself in worry.  
  
“...No…” Sumi responded somewhat regretfully, softening. “You look good. Happy and well-rested, actually. I just said that to _remind_ you not to trust him so easily. He claims he’s helping us, but what has he really done for us?”  
  
“....A free stay in a cool castle, new clothes, access to weapons and magical artifacts, a one of a kind education, companionship, advice, great cooking, even better eye candy-”  
  
“You weren’t supposed to actually answer that!” Sumi replied, feeling something in her stomach knot. When all of that stuff was actually said out loud, it made killing him sound kind of, maybe, a little… _bad._ _  
_ _  
_ But that was stupid, right?! Killing Alucard was clearly what they needed to do if he couldn’t satisfy them! Nothing could possibly go wrong! He was just some sad, lonely, pretty little weirdo out in the middle of nowhere! It wasn’t like killing him would make them just as bad as everyone who betrayed them on their travels, right? Of course not. It was different. They were _victims,_ and he was _dangerous._ _  
_ _  
_ Sumi left Taka to his pie, which definitely did not have a lovely aroma to it, or glossy, perfectly buttery-looking crust. She would not cave to the man.  
  
She definitely did not wake up in the middle of the night and sneak a slice or two from the second pie that Alucard was storing in his strange… “refrigerator”, was that what he called it? Whatever it was, Sumi did _not_ sneak pie from it, and she did _not_ love said pie to death.  
  
Taka may have been a weak fool who could only think with his stomach, but Sumi was different. Sumi was smart, capable, and most of all-  
  
As she happened to walk by the master bathroom, definitely not returning from the kitchen with pie, its door swung open. Sumi’s jaw dropped when she saw the reason why.  
  
Oh god, oh fuck, was that… was that Alucard in _just a towel?_ _  
_ _  
_ Sumi immediately averted her gaze. Or at least, she did as soon as she stopped drinking in his pale and perfectly toned figure, still slightly damp, candlelight illuminating him from behind and- _  
_ _  
_ Sumi could feel her cheeks burning as she stared pointedly at the floor, clenching her fists. Or at least one. The other hand was busy not-holding the pie she definitely didn't have. Damnit. Damnit! It wouldn’t be so hard to kill him if his tiddies weren’t so damn fat!  
  
“Oh, good morning, Sumi! E-excuse my current state, I was just finishing up in the shower… I know it’s rather early, but it's a bit difficult for me to sleep lately… I took a shower to try and relax myself... Breakfast will be ready soon, since you seem a bit peckish,” Alucard said, giving her a gentle, somewhat flustered smile.  
  
She definitely did not feel equally flustered as she smiled back and quickly excused herself.  
  
Stupid Alucard. Stupid Alucard _and_ his fatass tiddies. Now he _had_ to die. No man with a waist that narrow deserved tiddies that fat. It wasn’t _fair._ He needed to stop wearing shirts with such low cut v-necks, too. That _had_ to be illegal or something.  
  
It was all way too good to be true. Alucard _had_ to be plotting something. He was probably going to fatten them up with the pies and home-cooked meals. Probably thought it made their blood richer.  
  
A small part of her mind supplied that the theory didn’t make all that much sense when he was genuinely helping them with their training and they still got plenty of exercise, but she just moved onto something else instead. Once again, her mind protested that Alucard seemed too nice for the dastardly things she imagined… but she knew she could never put it past the man.  
  
Not even when he showed up knocking at her door in the very next minute, actually dressed and holding a glass of chocolate milk for her.  
  
“Figured you might be thirsty from the pie,” Alucard sweetly said. She took it in spite of herself. She’d never had anything quite like it before meeting Alucard, but _holy fuck_ was it good. Especially with baked goods, and- fuck, there she went again, giving in so goddamn easily... Apparently there were still things that Alucard would actually bother to go into civilization for, with guests to motivate him to put more effort into providing and impressing... even if he would never stay out for long, his powers allowing him to be there and back surprisingly swiftly.   
  
It was still long enough that Sumi knew full well she and Taka could use those shopping trips to set up new murder attempts, or at least ransack the place and then scram with his best books and artifacts... but they never did.

Sumi grumpily finished her snack, half of her grumpiness specifically because it was so good it made it hard to actually _stay_ grumpy.  
  
Things were getting out of hand. That hot bastard had to die before he could butter her up any further.

* * *

  
After breakfast, and morning training, Sumi and Taka met in private, each making a big show of trying to scheme up a way to kill Alucard as soon as possible…  
  
Somehow, three weeks slipped right past them anyway.  
  
They didn’t know how, but at the same time, they knew exactly how.  
  
Neither of their hearts were in it.  
_  
_ The more time passed, the more Taka and Sumi both agonized over having less and less reasons to actually kill Alucard. He was just so goddamn _nice,_ and _hospitable,_ and _caring,_ it drove them _mad._ _  
_ _  
_ They’d snuck through his journal, expecting to find his dastardly schemes to kill and exsanguinate them… only to find bits of poetry about them instead. _Good_ poetry at that, even if it was a bit cheesy. It was interwoven with fond recountings of their days together, even repeated passages about how Alucard was apparently _proud_ of the progress they were making. Beyond that, he just kept rambling on and on about people named Trevor and Sypha… perhaps even more fondly than he did for them, even if it was always undercut with fond snark about their more annoying aspects.   
  
Rather than extra information they could use to kill him or justify doing so, they were just left with gnawing guilt that refused to subside for days, thoroughly foiling any further murder planning for that timeframe.  
  
At one point, Taka had been slightly injured during training, pulling a muscle, only for Sumi to later find him being massaged by Alucard… and apparently enjoying it immensely, if his blushing face and low moans of delight were anything to go by. She played innocent in the moment, only to scowl at him when they were alone in a guest bedroom.  
  
“He has literal magic fingers, Sumi! Literal magic! I couldn’t help it!” was his only reply.  
  
“I’m starting to think you actually _like_ him, Taka!” Sumi replied.  
  
“W-well, okay, maybe a _little…_ B-but it’s not like we’re friends or anything! He’s still gotta die! And what about you, huh? What’s with the bracelet you’ve been wearing lately?”  
  
“It’s nothing, really!” Sumi cried, shrinking back a bit. She was indeed wearing a colorful little handmade bracelet, bright blue and yellow intertwining. “It’s just… something he made… to signify our… cooperation…”  
  
Sumi thought back to the incident just a few days ago, where Alucard had been awkwardly puttering about, obviously trying to hide that he was half-desperate to find things they could do together that weren’t all about training and studying… Neither Sumi or Taka particularly wanted the ‘bonding activities’, knowing all too well how they tended to get sucked in a bit too much… but Alucard’s answer had apparently been a book about _friendship bracelets,_ of all things. He’d assumed Taka wouldn’t be interested, and seemed embarrassed enough about asking Sumi… but in the interest of trying to seem kind and accepting, she’d feigned enthusiasm.  
  
It was just too bad that from there she actually ended up having genuine fun with it, even though she’d rather die than admit that out loud. It was so simple, and childish, but… nice? She hadn’t had much of a childhood at all, from what she could remember. Everything was always about work, or revenge, which always meant _more_ work. She half expected it was some weird ritual she was being tricked into, but no, apparently, there was absolutely nothing magical about the bracelet at all. She’d tried everything she could think of to check, even if her knowledge was admittedly limited.  
  
The worst part was that when it came to the feeling of lacking childhood, she got the feeling that Alucard was much the same.  
  
She did not like that feeling one bit.  
  
He wasn’t supposed to be fun, or relatable, or sympathetic.   
  
He was supposed to be a _monster._ _  
_ _  
_ What if it was what he wanted? A soft, childish, innocent little pet to play cute little games with, until he no longer found her cute or entertaining anymore? _  
_ _  
_ Sumi bristled at the thought. She wouldn’t allow it. He would _not_ make a childish little pet out of her!  
  
“A friendship bracelet, you mean,” Taka said bluntly, staring at her with half-lidded eyes as his voice yanked her back into the present.  
  
“N-no!” Sumi weakly tried, but when Taka’s unimpressed stare kept boring into her, she quickly folded. “Yes… But I’m only wearing it to keep up appearances, clearly… You understand that, right?”  
  
“Mhm…” Taka said quietly.  
  
“What? What’s the matter?”  
  
“...Why didn’t he give me one…” Taka said, almost pouting before he seemed to realize what he was saying, immediately trying to walk it back. “N-not that I _want_ one of those stupid things, haha! Especially not from some weirdo like him! It’s just… you know, the principle of the thing!”  
  
Taka sounded incredibly unconvincing, but Sumi found that she really didn’t have room to talk with a friendship bracelet literally sitting right there on her wrist. Or, she should’ve, if she honestly believed her excuse about “appearances”, but…  
  
No, what was she saying?! Of course she was only wearing it for appearances! Appearances and nothing else!

* * *

  
Sumi told herself that for the next few days, until a new shift in the daily routine thoroughly stunned her. After sinking so much time into trying to soften Alucard up… he was finally going to teach them actual magic! Sumi was so thrilled that she threw her arms around him and kissed him on the cheek… much to Alucard’s shock and her own mortification.  
  
“ _Why did I do that?!”_ her mind shrieked, only to answer itself with a calmer, but much more insidious thought.  
  
“ _Why didn’t I do it sooner?”_ _  
_ _  
_ To Taka’s credit, he made it a bit less awkward by making it more of a group hug than some Weird Kissing Thing, so Alucard just sort of laughed it off… even though his face was quite red.  
  
Part of Sumi couldn’t help but get a little excited over the brief surge of hope that he might actually _like it_ when she kissed him, but the rest of her was brutally stabbing that part of her to death.  
  
Everything was soon smoothed over, and the trio commenced with the magic training.  
  
It went well for all of two days… until Sumi and Taka got impatient and wanted to try stronger spells than the basic things Alucard was teaching them, so they did a bit of sneaking around to try and accomplish just that…  
  
They did find stronger spells, in some dusty old books that practically reeked of magic…  
  
So strong, in fact, that their attempt to practice it in secret ended up with Sumi waking up groaning and aching in bed, bleary-eyed and hardly able to move.  
  
Alucard and Taka were both there, watching in relief as she opened her eyes.  
  
“Sumi, I’m so sorry,” Taka immediately said, on the verge of tears as he kneeled down by the bed.  
  
“What… what are you sorry for?” Sumi asked, head still spinning.  
  
“When I tried that advanced fire magic and it basically just made an explosion instead… I got off a little better than you, but you got slammed against a tree… and then you… you didn’t wake up...” Taka said, looking away as he forced the last part out, eyes clenching shut with the pain of admission.  
  
“Oh… shit… that’s right…” Sumi replied, everything steadily coming back to her… along with a grim acknowledgement that Taka was wearing a cast and sling, having apparently broken at least an arm himself.  
  
“How bad is it?” Sumi asked, after which point Alucard took over.  
  
“With the spells and materials available, you should make a full recovery… but it will take some time. You broke a leg, a couple of ribs, and heavily bruised your back. Not to mention the assortment of burns.” Alucard said.  
  
“Are you… are you… mad at us?” Sumi asked. She wasn’t sure _why_ it was the first question she asked, as if she were some child afraid of punishment rather than a trained killer… but Alucard only shook his head.  
  
“Of course not. I admit it disappointed me, but… Ultimately, this is because I failed to satisfy your curiosity. There were things I should have told you but didn’t. I failed to inform you of just how dangerous magic can be. I did not want to seem patronizing. You both seemed so talented… I’m sorry.” Alucard said.  
  
Sumi felt herself suddenly _drowning_ in guilt, to the point she needed to bite back tears.   
  
They snuck out to learn magic specifically to help them kill the same person who was currently tending to them and apologizing to _them_ for it, despite it not being his fault at all.  
  
Sumi didn’t know what to say.  
  
Obviously, the plans to kill Alucard and end his fat-tiddied reign of “tyranny” did not so much fall to the wayside as they did tragically crash into it with a terrific bang, having been knocked completely off course by human stupidity.

* * *

  
Over the coming days, Taka expected Alucard to start unveiling his true colors, get angry that they directly disobeyed him and he had firsthand proof…  
  
He didn’t expect the man to just completely blame himself.  
  
Instead of insults and harsher treatment, Taka had to deal with the arguably far worse ordeal of sitting around in stifling guilt, on top of how useless he felt with a broken arm and a bit of a limp. Meanwhile, Alucard was just as nice as ever, if a bit more sullen… even in spite of having to play nurse to him and Sumi, all because they wouldn’t follow simple directions.  
  
Taka really didn’t get it. Injuring themselves was basically offering themselves on a silver platter. If Alucard wanted them dead, it was the perfect chance. If he wanted to force them into slavery when the time was right, he probably wouldn’t want ones that were so sneaky and disobedient.  
And yet… he just wouldn’t stop being nice to them. Taka really didn’t get it at all.  
  
Alucard would go to Sumi’s room for hours to keep her company and try to amuse her with stories, shadow puppets, and little magical parlor tricks… After the day she’d woken up, she could at least slowly hobble with a cane, but both Taka and Alucard insisted on maximum bedrest.  
  
So, there could be temporary peace. But Taka would definitely not let his guard down. Not one bit. No, sir.  
  
They still needed to do right by their people.   
  
So, with that in mind, Taka could _not_ let himself get distracted anymore! He would make Sumi proud, and no matter how weirdly kind Alucard was, he would _not_ get soft! He _refused!_ _  
_ _  
_ Taka then proceeded to not refuse at all.  
  
To be fair, Sumi didn’t seem to be refusing particularly well either. She’d gotten in the habit of getting piggyback rides from Alucard a lot more often ever since it became more difficult for her to walk…  
  
Even after their magically accelerated healing rates saw them mostly recovered in about another month.  
  
Taka felt like an idiot every time Alucard so much as opened his mouth, through no fault of Alucard’s own. Sometimes when he even so much as existed in the same room. Something about him just seemed to completely suck out all of Taka’s brain cells and leave him as a happy little dolt, all too content and complacent with eating Alucard’s desserts and following him like a lost puppy.  
  
Alucard was smart, fun, caring, fascinating, and absolutely _gorgeous._ And Taka hated it. Or… hated how much he loved it.

Taka hated how _obedient_ he'd become, ever since the accident. If he thought he was losing his nerve before, it was nothing compared to accidentally hurting Sumi. Suddenly, any thought of trying to deceive or disobey Alucard just struck him with the instant terror of it blowing up in his face again… and the guilt of considering it at all.

Taka didn't know when he'd started cuddling with Alucard multiple nights a week, initially seeking him to comfort his own crushing guilt and terrible nightmares… 

He didn't know why he'd opened up about that guilt and ended up having to listen to a disgustingly touching and genuinely moving story about how well Alucard could relate to hurting someone you cared about.

Sometimes… sometimes Taka could swear he was _falling_ for Alucard. But that was ridiculous. He was half-vampire. Taka wasn't allowed to like him, so he wouldn't, and he didn't.

_Except he did._

No he didn't! He didn't, it was just, just-

It was all according to plan! He was just buttering Alucard up a little more, that's all! Just a little more, and there was totally nothing genuine about it!

_Except maybe there was…_

No! No there wasn't!

Regardless of how much Taka told himself that, it didn't stop him from waking up on the living room sofa with Alucard one morning because they'd accidentally fallen asleep cuddling and reading a book about old heroes together… or more like, Taka listening while Alucard quietly read it with his disgustingly pretty voice.

And Sumi had seen them.

The very next moment she got alone with Taka, she was immediately on him about it.

Taka was instantly on the defensive, having been working on a lie the moment he woke up and realized what he'd done.

"It's my newest plan! This'll butter him up faster than ever! If we build his trust like this, he'll never see it coming!" Taka said, outwardly smiling but noting with grim dread that he felt guilty even just _lying_ about a plan like that. A plan that wouldn't have bothered him in the least before.

Sumi immediately knew he was lying.

She could've said something. Poked holes in it.

It would've been easy.

It would've been so, so easy.

But she'd be _damned_ if she didn't want an excuse to cuddle too.

"Oh, Taka, you sly fox you! That's a great idea! Can I join in?" 

"Uh… Sure!" Taka replied, having not expected that answer but being quite glad to hear it. "He really won't expect it if we _both_ do it."

* * *

So, the world's most bogus plan was officially put into motion.

For a solid month, the two happily spent every night cuddling with Alucard, all while trying to assure each other they were _totally_ serious about eventually killing him in his sleep.

Even when they started sleepily calling him gross pet names when they woke up in the morning, and even when they'd started coming up from behind to gently hug him while he made breakfast.

They were basically dating, even if no one officially said as much, and they weren't even sure if Alucard himself realized… he just seemed happy to go along with it.

It wasn't until their "scheme" to kill him by first having him lose his virginity that they realized just how utterly doomed they were.  
  
The first clue was that they never even got around to just _fucking_ him, for one.  
  
They’d undone their hair and gotten their clothes off, and then Taka started crying while straddling Alucard from above...  
  
Which was incredibly awkward for all parties involved, as Sumi just kind of froze like a deer in headlights while Alucard sat up and began somewhat stiffly holding and comforting him, not really sure what the problem was…  
  
Until Taka just came right out and said it.  
  
“We… I can’t do this…” Taka managed to choke out. A feeling of dread curled in Sumi’s stomach. She knew what he was going to say next. She knew, but somehow she couldn’t stop him. She was just… frozen.  
  
“Why… why not?” Alucard slowly, carefully responded.  
  
“We… we’ve been trying to kill you... f-for… for _months_ now…” Taka choked out.  
  
“Wh… _what?”_ Alucard responded, pulling away slightly to just look at Taka in utter perplexment. “You… but… when you say ‘trying to kill me’.... I… haven’t even noticed…”  
  
Sumi found herself caving as well, mouth seemingly moving almost on its own. “Every time we try, you’re just… you’re just so _nice_ we lose our nerve…” she said, feeling _beyond_ vulnerable and uncomfortable. Damnit, Taka, could the conversation really not wait until everyone at least had _clothes_ on?  
  
“Even tonight! Even tonight, we were gonna try it! But… but I can’t! You’re… it’s just not worth it. You don’t deserve it.” Taka said softly. “And I don’t… I don’t deserve you.”  
  
As much as Sumi _did_ want dick… honestly, she was also losing conviction by the moment.   
  
“I... “ Alucard started.  
  
“It’s okay if you don’t ever forgive us… I’ll… I’ll leave, if you want me to…” Taka said.  
  
“Don’t go,” Alucard said, all too quickly. He couldn’t fully hide the twinge of desperation his voice took on.  
  
“...Huh?” Taka said.  
  
“But… everything he said is… it’s true…” Sumi said. “We really did… we wanted to kill you…”  
  
“I… understand why you’d feel that way. It’s been hard. The world is cruel, and life is unfair. And… there are terrible things we do, when we feel like we have to. When we feel like the world has pushed us to that point, and there’s no other option. So… you don’t have to leave. I’m not perfect either.”  
  
“Should… should we at least… let you sleep alone tonight?” Sumi asked, once again feeling strangely like a child awaiting a scolding, her voice wavering despite her best efforts.  
  
“As I said… don’t go… please,” Alucard repeated. Sumi tensed at that, despite how gentle it was. She heard the longing, heard how _small_ the voice really was. Taka did too.  
  
There was no reason to be like a child afraid of a beating if the one before her was much like a child in his own right.  
  
Wanting to be comforted at night so that his monsters wouldn’t come out to get him.  
  
Part of Alucard wondered if he was being too lenient. Too nonchalant. But as he'd never even actually _seen_ one of the murder attempts, still attempting to process the reality of the admission... it didn't strike him quite as hard as he felt it should've. He'd deal with it more in the morning. For the time being, he was... more than tired, he was _weary_. And still clinging to companionship however he could.   
  
It was strange, but Sumi could understand. Taka could understand. There wouldn’t be sex, they were far too guilty and awkward for that, but… they could help.  
  
After all, they could kill monsters.  
  
And the one before them… was not one after all.


	2. We Hecked Up Some More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Since Chapter 1 was shockingly popular for an idea that sort of started out as a joke on my part, I decided to make This
> 
> Be warned, there’s more fucking around with timeline and events to a certain degree.
> 
> But basically, Alucard takes the confession better than expected... fluff and more backstory ensues, for the most part.
> 
> I'm also planning one more chapter on this fic... not to spoil too much, but it'll involve Trevor and Sypha.

The next morning, everything was initially normal… although that was purely because Alucard decided he absolutely needed to eat something and wake up a bit before delving into, well, whatever the fuck last night had been about.  
  
“So… out of curiosity… what exactly _were_ the plans to kill me like?” Alucard asked, at the breakfast table, once everyone had finished.  
  
“Well… I should’ve known this was coming, but it doesn’t make it any less awkward to talk about...” Sumi said, mumbling slightly.  
  
“I feel like you do deserve to know, but… yeah, at this point, it is definitely _super_ embarrassing. I mean… you held me while I was naked and crying about it, so… there’s not much worse than that, really...” Taka added on, cheeks burning.  
  
“I can wait here until you’re ready, but… I really do want at least _some_ kind of further explanation,” Alucard said, looking at Taka and Sumi with a gaze that seemed to pierce right through them.  
  
“Do you... promise it won’t make you hate us?” Sumi asked, before looking away in shame and seeming to backtrack. “No, actually, I shouldn’t make you promise that. You have every right to feel however you want to feel about it. I guess what I’m trying to say is… it’s pretty bad.”  
  
“Well, one of my previous friendships started with a duel and persisted with what was essentially daily bickering… so I am not opposed to things being… a bit unconventional.” Alucard started. “Go ahead. I’m listening. This will be a teachable moment, I believe.”  
  
“Well, let’s see… there were about… um, fourteen different times we intended to poison you...” Sumi started, voice getting just a touch louder.  
  
“Ten times with food, four times we would try to make it look like a training accident with my bow and some secretly poison-tipped silver arrows.…” Taka continued.  
  
“ _Fourteen?”_ Alucard said incredulously. Taka and Sumi noted that oddly, he looked more faintly amused than appalled.  
  
“We never actually got around to adding any poison to anything, though… and I would always chicken out and not use the poison arrows with the bow attempts…” Taka said. “...Apart from Sumi, no one’s ever complimented my bow skills the way you do…” Taka continued, blushing a bit.  
  
“Well, I actually have a very keen sense of smell, so if you truly tried to go through with a poisoning, I believe I would’ve noticed quite quickly.” Alucard said. “For future reference, this is a trait common to essentially all vampires. Regardless of poison, in most cases. Usually, your best bet would probably be to administer it forcibly, or find one you can safely inject in your blood, or continually ingest for a while... but that’s not really relevant in my situation. I wouldn’t drink your blood.”  
  
“...You… can, if you want to.” Sumi said, somewhat shyly. Taka nodded in agreement.  
  
“As long as you let us recover, it’s the least we can do,” Taka added on.  
  
“No,” Alucard said, almost too quickly, not wanting to admit that the thought _had_ crossed his mind more than once. “You’re not food. Not to mention… even if it’s me, does that not make you uncomfortable, having escaped from a vampire like Cho?” Alucard asked.  
  
“...Honestly, a little, but… we _did_ try to kill you, so doing something a little uncomfortable would only be fair.” Sumi replied.  
  
“I appreciate the offer, but I refuse to accept something like that.” Alucard replied. He didn’t fail to notice the way both Sumi and Taka smiled appreciatively, relaxing their postures a bit. “Now then… what were your other attempts to kill me like?” Alucard asked. “It’s… actually a little fascinating, in a morbid sort of way.”  
  
“Well… last night, we were gonna steal a tool to bind vampires and then stab you while you couldn’t move… I was in charge of getting it, but I never even actually had it in the first place…” Taka said. “I just went and pretended like I did, because I felt too terrible to even pick it up…”  
  
Sumi looked quite shocked for a moment, then regretful. “...I’m sorry. I didn’t know you felt that terrible about it…”  
  
“It’s my fault too. I should’ve spoken up, but I just kept pretending like I still wanted to so you wouldn’t be upset with me,” Taka replied.  
  
“I… no, Taka, you know you can tell me anything! I didn’t mean to put that much pressure on you!” Sumi replied.  
  
“As strange as it is to hear this… it is at least a little flattering that you were so against the idea in the end.” Alucard said, smiling weakly. “But hypothetically, if you did go through with it, I do have a magic sword, it would’ve been able to kill you both even in the event that I couldn’t move,” Alucard added on. He sort of liked being able to come at it from a ‘teacher’ sort of angle, if only because it helped him cope with how frankly batshit the situation was by allowing him to adopt a more detached, theoretical point of view.  
  
“Shit, wait, seriously?” Taka asked.  
  
“Of course,” Alucard said, casually holding out a hand and summoning the sword in question to his side in mere moments. The fancy series of flips it did on the way wasn’t necessary in the slightest, but impressing the two was a nice side effect.  
  
Sumi and Taka just stared blankly for a moment.  
  
“Shit. We really could’ve died last night…” Sumi said quietly.  
  
“Appears so,” Alucard said, far too casually.  
  
“...You’re more used to violence than you should be, aren’t you?” Taka asked.  
  
“Oh, absolutely,” Alucard replied, without missing a beat. He still seemed faintly amused, but that just made both Sumi and Taka squirm guilty. “What else was there?” Alucard continued, actually smirking slightly.  
  
“Well, we were going to try a Japanese banishing ritual on you, hoping that since it’s foreign to you, you would think we wanted to bless you until it was too late…” Sumi said.  
  
“Hmm… honestly, I would have to research if you even _can_ banish half-humans…” Alucard responded.  
  
“Either way, it required a suspiciously large amount of salt, so we shelved that one,” Taka explained.  
  
“And with your power, a surprisingly ridiculous number of ofuda to match,” Sumi added on.  
  
“Well, since I’m only vaguely aware of what ofuda even are, it is at least true that it would probably take me a little time to recognize what you were doing,” Alucard responded.  
  
“There were about eight plans involving holy water in some way, the Belmont hold has plenty of that stored up.” Sumi said.  
  
“What, were you going to just string it up above a doorway until I walked under it?” Alucard asked, seeming more amused and curious by the moment..  
  
Sumi just pursed her lips as Taka conspicuously cleared his throat.  
  
“Maybe...” Sumi finally admitted, her cheeks reddening. Alucard passed a stifled laugh off as coughing.  
  
“At one point we were seriously gonna just try to drop a huge rock on you, considering how high up this castle goes…” Taka admitted. “And if it didn’t work right away, I’d shoot silver-tipped arrows at you while you were distracted.”  
  
“To be fair, I came up with that one once it was getting pretty obvious that I didn’t actually want to kill you anymore, so I just wanted to sound like I was at least trying…” Sumi admitted.  
  
“Really?! So _that’s_ why that one sucked! I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings!”  
  
At that point, Alucard was actually _laughing,_ much to the surprise of both Sumi and Taka.  
  
“A-are you making fun of us?!” Taka cried.  
  
“N-no, it’s just… in an incredibly strange sort of way, this is just… somewhat charming, actually.” Alucard responded, earning a blush from both of his guests. “That you didn’t really want to kill me anymore, but you still felt compelled to keep coming up with new ideas, just so you wouldn’t disappoint each other. From that perspective… it’s really a bit touching, actually.”  
  
Both guests blushed even more at that.  
  
“W-why are you so calm about this, anyway? Do you not believe us?” Taka asked. “I wouldn’t cry in front of you just for the fun of it, you know!”  
  
“Our very first meeting involved you essentially stalking me. Although a little _hard_ to believe, I do believe you. I just felt like a bit of levity would make it easier to cope with the revelation.” Alucard replied. “And who knows? Maybe it is fun to tease you a bit,” Alucard continued with a smirk.  
  
Taka and Sumi just exchanged embarrassed looks at that, not able to deny that a bit of teasing was well within reason for them.  
  
“But… besides that… I am... fond of you. Both of you, very much so.” Alucard admitted, starting to look a little flustered himself.  
  
“....But why?” Sumi responded. “We’re… We don’t pay rent, we tried killing you, you had to take care of us when we got hurt, you cook for us, we kept asking annoying questions about things it turned out we weren’t even ready to know anyway…”  
  
“Not everything is about being _useful_ all the time _,”_ Alucard quietly replied. “People you care about shouldn’t be tools.”  
  
“But when people care about you, they should try to help you…” Taka replied. “We haven’t helped you _nearly_ enough. All we’ve done is use you...”  
  
“...Even if that was your original intention, I’ve greatly enjoyed you being here. I was drowning in grief and mourning before you came… but you brought me hope. Purpose. It’s even been fun, really.”  
  
“And what bullshit that turned out to be…” Sumi guiltily responded, crossing her arms and glaring down at the floor. “All because we couldn’t just fucking _trust you…”_ _  
_ _  
_ “It’s not bullshit. I’m still here. And you’re here apologizing to me. I already knew that no one’s perfect. But you… you’re proof that people can _change_ . Proof that my father wasn’t entirely correct about humanity. Even if you have done wrong, that’s... that’s good enough for me, honestly.” Alucard said.  
  
His voice was so honest that Sumi found herself suddenly on the verge of tears, averting her gaze even further while Taka looked over to her worriedly. “Thank you,” she said quietly, her voice cracking a bit. “I’m so sorry…”  
  
“You’re welcome,” Alucard gently responded. “And I forgive you. Both of you.”  
  
Taka grabbed Sumi’s hand and squeezed it tight, murmuring comforts to her in Japanese… although he was notably trying to hold back his own sorrow in the process.  
  
It was difficult, but… it was at least a bit of progress.

* * *

  
Weeks passed from there, all murder attempts well and truly stopping in their tracks for good.  
  
Things were cordial, if just a tad bit strained on Taka and Sumi’s part… Alucard could tell they were still dealing with the guilt, even if they didn’t outright say it. But besides that, they still all spoke, had lessons together, and cracked jokes.  
  
Taka had started gaining a greater interest in medicine and healing magic, with a bit of wind magic to boot, although he’d predictably become far more wary of fire magic.  
  
Sumi seemed to be much the same way, deciding to pursue wind magic with Taka… although on her part, she also added in some earth magic.  
  
Notably, they were both far calmer and more patient in their approaches than before, something that filled Alucard with pride and admiration.  
  
Meanwhile, Alucard was being as kind as ever… but to Taka and Sumi it seemed like he almost _knew_ what he was doing lately, like there was more of a _plan_ to all of his actions…  
  
Somehow, it didn’t exactly put them on edge as much as it made them… a bit curious.  
  
Undoubtedly, what he was doing had developed a downright _flirtatious_ edge.  
  
Heart shaped pancakes, innocently inquiring about Japanese dishes only for them to suddenly turn up on the dinner table the next night, with a level of detail that implied there was significantly more research effort behind the scenes… He’d even somehow gotten his hands on the right strain of rice and all the right kinds of vegetables, despite them all being unavailable anywhere that Taka or Sumi knew of in Europe.

Besides just the pie, Alucard had taught himself how to make rice balls, miso soup, stir fry, chazuke, several different styles of manju, and both udon and soba that were absolutely to die for. Not only was the noodle texture _sublime,_ but it actually included meat and spices to boot.  
  
To be fair, Sumi and Taka had been mostly vegetarian growing up, and then eating whatever they could come by after leaving Japan, not having much of a choice in the matter… It was naturally easier to feed people cheaply on vegetables instead of meat. As a consequence, Alucard quickly learned that they weren’t especially picky. Pretty much anything with half-decent meat was just about always their idea of decadence… both of them even freely admitted they’d eaten rats before.  
  
“Rats are still practically food fit for a king compared to fucking _natto_ .” Taka had explained during one dinner, grimacing on the last word.  
  
“Natto isn’t that bad! You’re glad for it when there’s nothing else to eat!” Sumi had shot back.  
  
Alucard was genuinely surprised, having never yet encountered even a single food Taka actually _disliked._ _  
_ _  
_ “You’ve been trying to argue that for _years_ , Sumi! You’ll never convince me!” Taka replied.  
  
“What _is_ natto, anyway?” Alucard asked. He was surprised he didn’t already know, but they’d always been quite vague about their pasts beyond what they were initially willing to tell him.  
  
“Fermented soybeans,” Sumi replied. When Alucard made a face too, she only pouted. “It’s good, I swear! It just takes a little getting used to!”  
  
“Sorry, I’m going to have to say that that _does_ sound absolutely awful,” Alucard replied with a laugh.  
  
“Y-you don’t know that! At least summon some and see how it tastes before you just agree with him! It’s no stranger than cheese, when you think about it!” Sumi protested, only earning more laughter from Alucard, as Taka spoke once again.  
  
“Trust me, I had to eat natto nearly _every day._ We were in training for the human honor guard and it was required of us. Apparently, it helps you get stronger… which I _guess_ they weren’t lying about, because I was strong enough to help free the others and I started noticing I wasn’t as short or thin as the other boys near my age… but _at what cost?”_ Taka dramatically concluded. _  
_ _  
_ _“_ It must be high in protein, then.” Alucard replied. “Makes sense, if you hardly ever got meat.”  
  
Taka had to actually take a second to remember what “protein” was, only remembering because his training in healing magic had been paired with the advanced knowledge of biology that Alucard's parents had collected… a more scientific approach was ironically the best way to go about healing magic in a reasonably secular sense, with so much of it being tied up in religions.  
  
Neither Taka or Sumi were particularly religious in any sense, although they did admit to multiple times where they agreed to stay with and/or work under churches in exchange for saying they’d convert… but each and every time had only been an act, especially after witnessing the hypocrisy and corruption embedded into just about every church they’d been to.  
  
Despite repeated involvement with churches, their job history had been a sordid assortment of semi-honest work combined with petty theft and more unsavory tasks as their general misanthropy and distrust grew… Apparently, once they’d neared night creature territory, they made a decently honest living hunting them down… provided that their clientele actually kept up their ends of the deal. Obviously, in a world where livelihoods and trade routes were constantly getting interrupted by monsters, and the two hunters had the misfortune of dealing with xenophobia, they often didn’t. That was the part where things became decidedly _less_ honest.

But even so, Alucard’s kindness didn’t falter.

* * *

  
At one point, Alucard even went over the castle’s movement mechanisms with his students, showed them the ruined room in spite of his own lingering trauma over the whole situation.  
  
It only made them both feel like idiots for always rushing it before. It really _did_ look like an absolute disaster. Showing it to them would’ve probably been a waste of time all along. The way they’d acted before, neither of them were confident they’d actually have the patience to wait until such a massive, intricate device was repaired.  
  
They’d have thought Alucard was just being lazy and stubborn, that his magic was such that if he _really_ wanted to, he could just snap his fingers and repair it just like that.   
  
Almost killing themselves with a fire spell and actually delving into all the ins and outs of magic and its complexity had quickly dissuaded them both of any notion that magic was really that simple, if only you were powerful enough.  
  
Even for Dracula, summoning such a massive amount of night creatures and demons took preparation, and the cost to him was cut dramatically by the fact that he barely had to control them once they rose. It was already their natural desire to feast on humanity.  
  
To summon the precise assortment of demonic creatures capable of helping to complete such a monumental task, and to control them well enough to see the job through in any reasonable timeframe… Not to mention the effort of fully reinstating such an incredibly potent spell as to move an entire castle...  
  
Dracula had well, _forever_ to accomplish such a thing, in theory. And much more power to begin with.  
  
For Alucard, it would require either a _plethora_ of human sacrifices, or essentially every scrap of strength Alucard had, excruciatingly and constantly drawn out over perhaps _months_ .  
  
Regardless, Alucard considered it. It would be unpleasant, but he was immortal. It was still unlikely he’d actually die, so long as he conserved just a touch of power for himself.

It would go beyond just them. If the castle could move again, that was potentially more people he could help, more knowledge he could spread…

Perhaps his parents would even be pleased…  
  
A few more weeks of Alucard trying his best to pin down the theories of how exactly he would have to allocate his resources went by, many nights spent covertly trying to calculate construction times and magical power available, trying to figure out the best way he might go about such a monumental task… Perhaps if he spent enough time beforehand, stocking up his excess magical energies in external stores until he actually needed them, he’d be more able to handle the strain on his own terms...  
  
Of course, the moment Alucard brought Taka and Sumi _back_ to the chamber and proposed his plan to have his summoned creatures help them with the work, he was immediately shot down.  
  
“The first thing you taught us about magic is that it _always_ has a price.” Sumi said. “ _Especially_ dark magic. I know you wouldn’t want anyone else to have to suffer to power magic like what you’re proposing… so that means that the entire burden would be on you…”  
  
“Not to mention, we’ve never seen you do anything like this before… which I can only guess is because you don’t actually want to… and you probably don’t _want to_ because you don’t want to be like your father, since he's the one who released all those night creatures.” Taka added on. In the semi-lit conditions of the vast chamber where the ruined device was held, his eyes seemed to bore into Alucard all the more.  
  
Alucard swore under his breath, feeling both exposed and somewhat impressed. For all their faults, Sumi and Taka definitely weren’t idiots.  
  
Before, the two had to admit they probably would’ve been perfectly willing to cajole Alucard into a difficult, exhausting, traumatic state of prolonged stress and fatigue just for their own desires…  
  
But that was before.  
  
“You’re both correct,” Alucard said. “I just… I wanted to be able to help you.”  
  
“Even so… thinking about it now… I don’t think we should use your castle like that anyway. “ Sumi said, with such casual decisiveness that Alucard was silently blown away.  
  
Alucard merely blinked for a moment, almost doubting what he was hearing. “But… what about making sure your people are safe?” Alucard asked.  
  
“I still want to be able to fight vampires… but being realistic… it’s already been years. Cho left before the night creatures started showing up, and before what happened to your mother. Dracula needed her for something earlier than any of that, apparently. You probably already suspected. It’s not like we could learn this much of your language overnight. And… would they even trust us now, suddenly coming back after all this time with stories about befriending a vampire and using his magic and his teachings? I don’t mean to offend you, but from their perspective, wouldn’t that sound _just a little_ suspicious?” Sumi pointed out, looking at him with a sort of melancholy that broke his heart.  
  
Alucard just blinked a couple of times, having honestly never even thought of that. He was so busy having a limited pool of interaction that he’d actually almost forgotten how much of the world would likely still hate him for even existing.  
  
And how many people could end up hating those two by extension… Even on top of whatever discrimination they likely already had to face before. The world wasn’t particularly tolerant of _anything_ different, it didn’t have to just be vampirism.  
  
“And to be completely honest… it’s not like that was some tight-knit community of saints, all cowering innocently and helplessly under big, mean, scary Cho…” Taka admitted, scowling slightly as he did.  
  
“We like to try and remember the best sides of them… There were some good people there. People trying their best with bad situations. But we never had family. Even then, we had to stick together no matter what. And not everyone was always _against_ her…” Sumi said.  
  
“And for a lot of things, little kids aren’t as useful or reliable as adults… So you’ve always got people who sort of think you’re a burden. _Especially_ if you do anything wrong,” Taka said, an undercurrent of bitterness to his tone. “Even with other kids… I think I’ve told you before that training for honor guard meant we were stronger than most of the other kids there, and we got more to eat and a couple of extra privileges. A lot of them got _really_ jealous… They didn’t care that it was exhausting and terrifying, or that you could get hurt really bad in the training sessions, or that they would constantly make you train until you felt like you were gonna throw up… they were just tired of being tired and hungry all the time.”

Alucard began to realize more than ever that their chronic wariness and distrust didn't just magically not exist before they left their birth country.  
  
"And if we hadn't been able to get away, she probably would've wanted us to have babies with one another, only to take them away and have them grow up fully loyal to her. Since Cho's immortal, she thinks further ahead than most would…" Sumi said, sighing deeply. "It's related to children not being as useful. Not all children got to stay. Those of us kept around were deemed the best, or at least the tastiest… and the ones who would be providing her the best new generation, when the time came…"

Alucard simply stared with a quiet horror for a moment, the words and all their twisted meanings sinking in.

"I'm… truly sorry to hear that." Alucard said.

"The important thing is that we're here now,” Taka said, trying to force a smile. “But to be honest… Being here has given me a lot of time to think… and I don't know what I would actually want to do with my life afterwards, even if we were able to free them for good. At this point… I can hardly imagine anything like a normal life in Japan. It was almost always just with Cho, away from any normal town or village. Even if we stayed with the people Cho enslaved, even if they trusted us… we’d probably always be different from them. Part of them, but… not really. We had actual jobs in a normal village for a little bit, just enough to be able to afford supplies and a boat ride out of there… and…" Taka’s voice grew small and quiet.

"It was terrible," Sumi plainly finished, as Taka trailed off. "Everyone knew we were outsiders and started treating us differently almost right away. Pay was shit, boss was a fucking pervert. Some monks gave us shelter while we worked there, but even they had us do shitty chores and barely tolerated us. On the bright side, I ended up breaking that pervert boss’s wrist, and Taka broke his nose. We had to leave immediately after that, but he deserved it," Sumi said with a brief laugh. "But besides that… I agree with Taka. I don't… I don't know what we'd do. Be vampire hunters over there, maybe? Fighting for a bunch of people it's like we were hardly ever an actual part of? People who are part of a society that doesn't even do anything about it when you give up your own kids to vampires..."  
  
“And I hate to admit it… but… how to put this… Saving the people… for me, I don’t ever think it was _really_ about saving them,” Taka said.  
  
“What do you mean by that?” Alucard asked. Sumi already seemed to somehow know what he meant, keeping her head low, as if guiltily thinking the same thing.  
  
“I just… mostly, it’s always been about what _Sumi and I_ would get out of it, not _them_ . I wanted them to respect me more. I wanted to feel like I was better than them, stronger, more important… I wanted to be their hero for the _status,_ to _look good,_ to be _loved,_ not just to help them… Even though those of us who did well in honor guard training were always the ‘spoiled’ ones as it was… Honestly, I sort of _hated_ a lot of those people anyway…” Taka admitted, voice breaking slightly.  
  
“So did I…” Sumi admitted. “Honestly… some of the happiest things I can remember… were when it was only Taka and I. No one else to bother us.” she continued, almost unconsciously grabbing Taka’s hand as she said it.  
  
Taka blushed a bit at that, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment. “I’m the same way… out of all of them… Sumi always mattered most.”  
  
Alucard actually had to clear his throat for a second, getting slightly emotional over those words. “S-so… if you don’t want me to fix the teleporter… what are you two planning on doing here in the future, then?” Alucard asked. "I-in… Europe," he somewhat clumsily added on, not wanting to jump to any conclusions.  
  
"Well… whatever it is… I want you by our side." Sumi said. Taka nodded in agreement, while Alucard felt his stomach suddenly fill with butterflies.

"And… there's easily enough knowledge here to last someone a lifetime, isn't there?" Taka said with a smirk, implying he knew _precisely_ what he was implying.

Alucard spluttered, blushing heavily.

"You-you don't mean…"

"We'll stay for as long as you'll have us," Sumi said, smiling warmly. "If that's...alright with you..."

"O-of course!" Alucard could hardly get the words out fast enough.

* * *

  
Something about that day only got Alucard’s flirtations going even more.  
  
More weeks passed by, filled with gentle strokes of the hair, tender touches that drew both of his guests wild.  
  
Looks filled with undeniable fascination, assured longing…  
  
Praise that was less innocuous than before, more wanting and sensual.  
  
Neither Taka or Sumi fully understood. _Why_ was he still being so nice, if not _nicer?_ It was obvious enough that he liked them, but… _why_ did he like them so much, when they clearly didn’t deserve him?  
  
They could swear he was almost _enjoying_ himself, trying to see just how much he could get under their skin.  
  
The end result was not unlike an exceptionally odd game of cat and mouse.  
  
No one knew exactly what to call the dynamic beyond an ‘alliance’. It was an odd mash of a relationship and… not quite.  
  
Alucard still wanted them sleeping next to him at night, apparently having a significantly easier time sleeping that way… So did they, so they didn’t particularly mind… But he didn’t try to push it any further, much to their relief. They had no right to try going _there_ with him again.  
  
In other regards, it was strangely… formal, almost. They always greeted him respectfully, and they kept their distance enough that Alucard was nearly always the one initiating contact.

Taka and Sumi also still seemed considerably more keen on helping with chores than before… Before, it’d just been for the sake of seeming nice, or to just clean up after themselves, but it'd evolved into a much more proactive sort of thing, steadily going through to sort and clean the castle while also making sure to help with hunting and cooking. Alucard couldn’t help but be shocked by just how much more functional and organized the place was actually looking, even in some of the areas that gave him the hardest time, mentally speaking.

It had the handy side effect of keeping them busy enough to have an excuse to maintain a certain degree of friendly distance from Alucard… but while Alucard was grateful for the help, he couldn't help but feel a bit… dissatisfied with the arrangement.

Sure, they said they previously intended to kill him, and logically, that was a pretty good reason to kick them out, or be wary of them…

But on the other hand, the fact that they never even got halfway through an attempt without losing their nerve had to say something about their characters...

And they were the third and fourth still-living people he ever cared about… and he still loved spending time with them...

And they _did_ come clean…

And it didn't hurt that they were honestly both distressingly gorgeous… and seeing them naked only had him further convinced of that.

There may or may not have been an undercurrent of questionable self-esteem to Alucard's decision making process, but his decision was quite clear.

He still _wanted_ them.

So, if they cracked that much just because he was nice…

He would just have to be _even nicer._

One afternoon, Alucard approached them both a bit after their usual training session with bouquets of roses… which they quickly caught on to the oddity of.

"These are beautiful, but… winter's starting now. And they don't grow around here at all. How…" Sumi asked.

"A man has his ways," Alucard said with a smirk. "Although I can actually go over the process, if it interests you…"

"What'd you do?" Sumi asked, while carefully studying the immaculate flowers from every angle. It distracted her from having to look at how brain-breakingly pretty the man in front of her was.

"Well, getting the seeds only required the sacrifice of a few drops of blood. Just seeds, since whole flowers would've been trickier… and I wanted it to be a bit more personal anyway. I've been thinking of taking up gardening anyway." Alucard said. “Maybe we could start up a bit of farming, when it gets warmer…”

"How did you get them to grow, then? How long have you been planning this?" Taka asked.

"Oh, that wasn't too bad. I'm naturally somewhat incompatible with conventional life magic, but I managed to get a fish into a sack of water and transfer its life force into the flowers and soil. It only took a couple of days to grow it from there. From there, the fish was still perfectly serviceable to have for dinner."

"...Could we learn how to do stuff like that?” Taka asked with quiet wonder. Alucard was silently grateful that he didn’t seem bothered by what was essentially still dark magic, still robbing another creature of life to redistribute it elsewhere, even if it was one of the tamest examples possible.  
  
Alucard paused for what felt like forever, almost long enough that Taka was about to tell him not to bother. “Only if you promise you’ll be _extremely_ careful. What I did was still dark magic, just on a very small scale. But as I’m sure you’ve heard during our study sessions, the thing about dark magic is that it’s very tempting to… _scale up._ And such things are naturally much less of a risk for me, being immortal and inherently bound to such things. You’re human. You’re far more susceptible, and it won’t come as easily to you.”  
  
“We promise!” both Sumi and Taka responded at once, lighting up with glee as for the first time in weeks, and perhaps only the second or third time in the months since their confession, they initiated a group hug with him.  
  
But through the brief rush of giddiness and sheer fondness, Alucard was at least still perceptive enough to notice their mutual thirst for power, even if it was something they’d both become more self-aware and critical of. He’d definitely need to tread carefully.  
  
There were more little gifts, over the coming weeks. Different kinds of flowers, steadily placed around the castle and in the bedroom they were sharing. Sometimes kept alive with magic, but sometimes just kept in pots, tended to the normal way once a bit of magic got them to full size.  
  
New winter clothes made of the finest furs, Alucard having gone out to civilization for them yet again.  
  
Even more effort was put into figuring out more Japanese recipes… even down to using summoning circles to get the right kinds of rice and vegetables.  
  
Sumi and Taka felt there was nothing that could achieve a stranger mix of terrifying and charming than smelling brimstone in the kitchen only to rush in and see Alucard arguing with some little imp on the kitchen counter about the quality of its daikon radish haul.  
  
On one hand, yes, that was technically a _fucking demon_ in the kitchen. On the other hand, they’d already seen and fought significantly larger ones… and it was honestly _beyond_ sweet that Alucard would pull strings with Hell just to get them authentic Japanese ingredients.  
  
Even sweeter, they realized Alucard would painstakingly rinse the vegetables in holy water as well, making sure to put on waterproof gloves to do so… although the risk he was taking in that regard immediately made them want to step in for him.  
  
With all the things in the castle and the hold combined, there were plenty of options for something valuable enough to trade away but small enough that it wouldn’t be particularly missed. Oftentimes, Alucard already had so much inherent magical potency that only a relatively small amount of blood or magical energy would completely cover the requirements of a summoning, so Alucard didn’t really mind the communions with demonic forces if it would help him please Taka and Sumi.  
  
But already, Alucard’s flirting and spoiling with the two had lasted all the way into mid-winter... So during the first big snowstorm of the season, Alucard decided he was not above a bit of… theatrics, if it would get him closer to what he wanted.

* * *

  
They were all just finishing dinner, the snow coming down thickly, when Alucard dangled his bait. “I’m cold…” He said, trying his best to sound a little pitiful but not lay it on too thick. “This castle is just so big and ancient…. it can really get a draft going like nothing else,” Alucard said.  
  
“I… guess it is a little chilly in here?” Sumi replied, a bit confusedly, not entirely seeing what the big deal was.  
  
“I’m fine, honestly,” Taka responded. Having grown used to wandering about with sometimes absolutely abysmal supplies, and through times when he’d been scrawnier and more poorly fed, he’d gained quite a resistance to adverse temperatures… not that he didn’t wear Alucard’s winter gear nearly every day, on top of making sure to take excellent care of it.  
  
“Well, if you’re really so much warmer than me… why don’t you _prove_ it?” Alucard goaded, smirking.  
  
The others began catching on almost right away. “...Did you just say you were cold so we’d cuddle with you?” Sumi asked. Alucard looked away, silently cursing how sharp she could be.  
  
“You could just _ask,_ you know,” Taka told him with a laugh.  
  
“In theory, yes, but… I just feel like… for a while now, you haven’t been initiating contact with me, but at the same time, it seems like you both do whatever I say to try and make up for before… so I am sorry if this was a bit manipulative, but honestly, the alternative ends up feeling like I’m sort of forcing you…”  
  
“That’s not _forcing_ us... We just want to do things for you because we… we care about you, and we’re still really sorry about what we tried to do to you,” Sumi said.  
  
“Honestly, I’m still not sure _why_ you still like us so much after everything we did, but… if… if you want… I’ll try harder to not be so nervous around you.” Taka added on.  
  
“That would be nice…” Alucard said, as a clear understatement. He’d been patient for _months,_ and it was slowly eating at him. How much longer until they fully accepted that he didn’t _care_ that they tried to kill him anymore? They could at least hug him a little more, damnit! Of course, he didn’t want to force them into anything, which was the other half of the problem… but _still._ _  
_ _  
_ Both Taka and Sumi just giggled, leading Alucard out to the living room sofa to give him what he’d asked for, happily nuzzling up to him on either side.  
  
As he relaxed into their touches, a contented giddiness welling up in his chest, Alucard felt a bit bold. "And… if it’s really alright to ask you things… would you… maybe, um… call me Adrian?" Alucard asked. “That is my real name, after all…”

"Uh… o-okay! Um… A...Adrian…" Taka managed to force out, seeming to stumble over the name as his face went bright red. Sumi seemed to be having trouble speaking at all, face going strangely red and pulse quickening for some reason.

Alucard frowned slightly. "Is something the matter?" he gently inquired.

"It's just… in Japan, it's… usually kind of a big deal to start calling someone by given name. In the case of our own names… we don't really _have_ families, so family names don't really matter for us… and since coming here, we usually don't mind doing it for other people… but… with you…"

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable, then," Alucard swiftly replied. 

“It’s not _uncomfortable_ ....” Sumi interrupted. “Not in a _bad_ way, anyway… it’s just… a lot.”  
  
“I’m noticing you haven’t actually said his given name yet, though,” Taka pointed out with a smirk.  
  
“I-I was getting to that!” Sumi shot back. “I’m doing it right now, in fact! I mean, how hard could it be, I just have to call him…”  
  
Sumi went dead quiet, as if her tongue had hit some kind of brick wall.  
  
The mix of all the implications, combined with the sense that she still didn’t quite _deserve_ to actually speak his true given name…  
  
When she finally forced out “ _Adrian_ ”, but as nothing more than a uncharacteristically shy, tiny little whisper, Taka couldn’t help but laugh. Alucard was quite amused himself, but mostly preoccupied with how it was probably one of the cutest things he’d ever seen.  
  
“See? It _is_ hard!” Taka said, grinning ear-to-ear. “Say it again.”  
  
“I second that,” Alucard added on.  
  
“...A… Adrian…” Sumi murmured, still looking away and completely red-faced. She felt ridiculous. She’d overcome and survived so much… just to struggle so massively with something as simple as a _name?_  
  
“Wait, I think I can do it clearly this time!” Taka said, clearing his throat for a moment before proceeding. “Adri- ...Adrian,” he ended up saying, his voice cracking on top of the stutter.  
  
It was Sumi’s turn to laugh at that, even making sure to laugh extra hard to get back at Taka for laughing first.  
  
“It’s really this big of a deal?” Alucard asked, amused yet incredulous.  
  
“Well, it is when you… when you… really care about someone…” Taka said softly. “Part of me… feels like I don’t really deserve to say it yet.”  
  
“I know. But even so… I can’t help but be fond of you...” Alucard said softly, leaning closer to Taka, lips parting just slightly.  
  
It was at that point that Taka gave up. Fuck it. Fuck it all. If some unbelievably sweet, beautiful man was going to keep insisting he _still_ liked him, even after everything Taka put him through, even after the terrible things he did…  
  
Maybe the only real obstacle left was that Taka was just overthinking things.  
  
The distance closed in no time at all, lips finally meeting. Alucard’s arms were around him in moments, pulling him in closer as the kiss deepened, Taka moaning softly as he embraced Alucard in turn.  
  
If that was the kind of love Al-... _Adrian_ wanted so badly, maybe Taka didn’t have to keep being so distant, didn’t have to put up walls, didn’t have to be awkward and afraid. _  
_ _  
_ There could be an apology in every kiss, every stroke, every tender gesture.  
  
And if he had to go on that way forever, offering that apology without end…  
  
He supposed he could live with that just fine.  
  
Meanwhile, while Sumi was originally rather taken aback and then enthralled simply by watching the two kiss, she didn’t want to be left out for long.  
  
Luckily, as if reading her mind, Taka stopped just long enough to beckon her over, a mischievous smirk playing across his handsome features. Alucard was less overt, but clearly waiting with baited breath, pupils dilated and expression almost bewildered, as if hardly believing she was really going to join in too.  
  
Sumi and Taka worked quickly together, always seeming to be in sync. They quickly decided to keep Alucard in the middle, but things felt rather different from the ill-fated, botched attempt at lovemaking. The kisses and caresses were slow and gentle, so much so that Alucard almost felt as if it were a tease.  
  
They were still somewhat cautious, seeming to want Alucard to decide the pace, to take charge. Meanwhile, Alucard seemed to want _them_ to do it.  
  
Taka had an idea to change that. “Come on, Adrian~” he coaxed, softly, tenderly, willing his voice to stay steady under the weight of the name. Fortunately, it did.  
  
Alucard took the bait in an instant, motivation absolutely soaring as he began to kiss more needily, more aggressively, getting more handsy to boot. Taka, for his part, seemed to have gotten exactly what he wanted, matching the pace with ease.  
  
Of course, Sumi wanted Alucard’s attention too… so she’d just have to steal the idea for a bit.  
  
“Adriaaannn~,” Sumi softly moaned, immediately catching Alucard’s attention. She’d been at his neck, planting soft, light kisses before Alucard wordlessly made it quite clear that he’d prefer their lips mashed together instead.  
  
Alucard couldn’t claim to be experienced by any means, but they were both damn good kissers, if he had to say. He couldn’t even begin to choose a favorite in that category, and he didn’t particularly _want_ to anyway, his brain was too busy trying not to completely short circuit from the sheer exhilaration and passion he felt.  
  
Taka seemed to take losing that extra bit of attention better than Sumi, busying himself with steadily snaking an arm up under Alucard’s shirt and trailing his fingers along the immaculate muscle. Alucard didn’t mind in the least, absent-mindedly lifting a finger that briefly glowed scarlet at its tip, an unspoken spell then helping to lift the shirt off of his figure.  
  
Taka’s soon followed. He was a bit meatier than Alucard, strong and hearty. Still, after three square meals a day plus snacks and dessert, along with colder weather and comfortable domesticity, his abs had all but gone, modest layers of softness taking their place. Alucard only found it all the more endearing. He was glad to know his cooking was being so thoroughly enjoyed.  
  
Sumi didn’t really mind either, despite having previously tried to use the topic to keep Taka from getting too attached to Alucard… but with that no longer being something to _avoid,_ she’d let him have all the pie he liked.   
  
Sumi’s top soon followed. She didn’t indulge herself quite like Taka did, but they could notice she’d become a bit softer and fuller-figured as well, even if she was no less dangerous with a sword.

Alucard wouldn’t be surprised if her chest had grown as well, considering the way he could feel it press against him as she deepened their kisses, softly moaning as she made her pace just a bit more aggressive, spurts of activity punctuated by little lulls and pauses to gauge Alucard’s responses… which, of course, were always plenty enthusiastic.  
  
Before long, but after what at least _felt_ like a long time, Taka and Sumi had their attention focused on one another instead, a series of intimate movements and gasps more familiar than what they had with Alucard… although he wasn’t left out, still sneaking in kisses and letting his hands roam, often still getting attention in turn.

The sofa they were on honestly wasn’t supposed to be for three people to lay on all at once, but by the end of everything, they were too content and sleepy to care. Full from dinner and all contentedly warm and satisfied with one another, the napping arrangement was essentially just them stacked like logs, Sumi almost between Taka and Alucard but also just sort of lying on top of them.  
  
They actually had to ask if she was genuinely comfortable like that… but not only was she doing decently well, being a woman used to sleeping in far worse conditions, but there was a lot worse she’d endure for the privilege of sleeping partially atop two gorgeous men.  
  
It was a good night.

* * *

  
The day after the snowstorm, the ground was thick with at least a foot of it.  
  
The three had originally gone outside that morning in their winter clothes just to survey how bad the storm had been, and what it might mean for hunting and training. They’d only been standing on the front steps to the castle, meaning to go back inside in a moment... but while Sumi was briefly distracted by the beauty of the fresh snow, Taka took the opportunity to sling a snowball at the back of her head.  
  
Alucard’s eyes widened in surprise as Sumi instantly spun around, and Taka pointed at him while poorly stifling laughter.  
  
“Oh, it is _on,_ you little liar,” Sumi said, not fooled for even a second as Taka tried his best to escape into the snow… only to misjudge just how deep and cumbersome it was, giving Sumi plenty of time to hurl two snowballs back at him. At that point, Taka realized his best option was probably to just stand his ground, giving a dramatic war cry for effect.  
  
Before long, it escalated into a full-scale snowball fight… if not a war, since it began with quite a bit of dramatic tension over which “side” would have Alucard, both of them sweetly rattling off favors they could do for him and flattering words in the name of not siding with “the enemy”.  
  
Ultimately, Alucard decided he would simply go up against both of them, in the interest of fairness....  
  
Even if Taka did, at one point, seriously offer to suck his dick, to which Sumi instantly replied that she was much better at it than him, citing the logic of “It’s usually just us, and it’s not like he can suck his own”  
  
Alucard had been redder than a tomato after hearing that exchange, and not just from the cold.

Still, they all ended up being shocked by just how much fun they were having.

Taka and Sumi still weren't particularly used to just… playing around. Everything was always about duty. Revenge. Training. As honor guard trainees, they’d gotten used to the constant reminder of “if you have the energy to play, you have the energy to train”.

Alucard was less than used to it himself, only having distant memories of his childhood to go on, memories that simultaneously felt like yesterday and an eternity ago with everything he’d had to go through since.

But snowballs flew with abandon regardless, shrieking laughter filling the air.

Alucard had promised not to use any of his abilities, making it more fair… although even when he wasn't actually trying to use any of his powers, his hearing and reflexes were still obviously above the norm.

Sumi came up with quite a clever way around it.

"Adriaaan~" Sumi called. Like a complete sucker, Alucard dumbly spun towards the direction he heard her voice from.

A snowball cleanly nailed him in the face.

He wiped his face clean and spluttered, embarrassed that that'd actually worked so well.

Taka had somehow gotten up in a tree while he was distracted by her, and being an archer, his aim was decidedly deadlier than hers.

Three snowballs came one after another, but Alucard recovered in time to dodge another three  
  
“Ha! We got you good that time, huh?” Taka called..  
  
“No monster or vampire will stand a chance!” Sumi called.

Alucard just gave a frustrated grunt, dusting snow off of himself before responding. "Yes, well, I’m sure it’ll work out just fine if any of your _other_ opponents are in love with you!” Alucard sarcastically called, only to realize a second too late just what he’d said.

Everyone's eyes seemed to widen at once.

Alucard quickly clapped a hand over his mouth, standing stock-still and mentally screaming, but it was too late.

They heard.

There was a brief terror, a worry that he'd overstepped, that that was too much… 

But after the pause, and Taka very nearly falling out of the tree from the shock of what’d been said, there came a question from Taka.  
  
“You… you really feel that way?” Taka called from the tree, clearly bewildered but unable to stop himself from grinning..   
  
“...Yes,” Alucard forced himself to reply, once he was composed enough to endure how flustered he was. As soon as he voiced that confirmation. Sumi was bounding towards him through the snow, laughing, while Taka seemed to have a similar idea, leaping straight from the tree to rush towards him.  
  
Taka reached him first, thudding into him powerfully enough to nearly knock Alucard over as he was gathered into a tight embrace, while Sumi followed soon after.

"I love you too, Adrian." Sumi said quietly.  
  
“I love you… three, Adrian” Taka added on, as they all briefly chuckled at the small joke.   
  
Adrian was glad there was something to laugh about, since it meant he could blame his tears of joy and disbelief on a combination of laughter and cold wind in his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP to people who like everyone perfectly toned but listen,,, getting soft from love and pampering is adorable and no one can change my mind. There are also multiple canon lines relating to how much both of them liked Alucard's cooking.
> 
> In my brainworld, Alucard totally gets them a little soft and spoiled. Plus, I just love the idea of “softening up” being more than metaphorical. Actual physical indication of how loved and content you are? *chef’s kiss*
> 
> Of course, when there’s actually more fighting or physical shit to do in general, they probably drop it… but then as soon as it gets calm that cute little bit of squish is sneaking right back on.
> 
> Also, this chapter made me do research for certain shit, and Cho getting to Europe is one thing because she has vampire powers and vampire connections, but I honestly have no idea how the hell two regular Japanese people got to Europe in the fucking 1470s... so it’s either an anachronism due to the influence of vampires and magic, or they just went to China and then kept going west by land. I’m going with the second one, but holy shit that’s a long journey. Also going with the idea that Cho had better maps of the world and they were able to steal one of those too.
> 
> Hell, going even deeper into this rabbit hole, there shouldn't be anyone actually calling their country "Japan" at this point. But you know. Translation convention and all that. 
> 
> EDIT: After writing this, I discovered that a lot of people in old-timey Japan just didn't have last names even if they did have families. And you know what, given that this is clearly an alternate universe, I'm just going to go ahead and keep the inaccuracy because I like the part where this is relevant.
> 
> I did at least still cut out some of the Japanese food mentions I originally made if it seemed like they weren’t around by then. (apparently they didn’t even have bread until they got the concept from the Portugese or something)
> 
> But I’m still going on the assumption that there are barely any other Japanese people in Europe yet, meaning that there really isn’t an easy way for a Japanese person to learn any western languages yet…
> 
> Which led to another problem, considering that I think their story gives them like, one year to have believably been in Europe, and then you have to account for how long it’d take to get there too? In my mind, Taka and Sumi left Japan in only their mid-teens at the most, giving them enough time to become this fluent in whatever the local language is, since my headcanoning refuses to accept that they’re anything over 25… and even that feels high. They also canonically mention reading books with Alucard too, which is honestly even crazier considering that many native fucking citizens weren’t even literate yet…
> 
> Even if Dracula had a translation spell or a bunch of Japanese texts or something, it’s still kind of wild to me that people under Cho would ever have a chance to learn how to read Anything…. And they do canonically mention reading her materials too. Then again, she was apparently very arrogant. Maybe she thought high literacy rate made her seem more impressive by association, or used it as ammunition to guilt trip people with “look how generous I’ve been to you”
> 
> So, to partially get around that, Cho just got summoned to Europe a good deal earlier for some initial reason besides helping to wage war on humanity. I’m not gonna think too hard about whatever that is, I just need a way to make this make some level of additional sense. The only other thing I can think of is that at some point some mage decided to bestow them some kind of universal translator spell, for whatever reason. (or there was an artifiact that does this and they just fucking stole it, I could see that happening too)
> 
> I also came away with the feeling that Taka and Sumi don’t want power and revenge on Cho just because they actually cared for their fellow captives that much. Realistically, and especially given the rest of Castlevania’s takes on human nature, there’s no way it’d be a community of perfectly innocent little victims who all band together and manage to collectively overcome their deep-seated trauma and dysfunction. Having Cho as a common enemy wouldn’t be enough to accomplish that by a long shot.
> 
> I kind of got the sense it’s a little bit genuine, but it’s largely a glory/ego thing framed with some sympathetic posturing, even if they don’t really like to admit it to themselves either… since they also seem to have quite a bit of persecution complex going on.
> 
> So, that’s how I led into the thing with them deciding not to go back.
> 
> I grappled with it for a while, wondering if it seemed like a too much of a copout to keep them from leaving Alucard, but I think it’s sort of fitting of the darker tone of the source material… giving up on something more heroic because you realize your motivations weren’t very heroic to start with.


End file.
